Registration Opens April 22!!!

With Mamaroneck Town Supervisor Nancy Seligson in 2008, at the virgin running of Paine to Pain

Paine to Pain is Back!!!!  (We hope!)

OK, we can’t read crystal balls any better than you, but it sure looks like that coronavirus (cursed be its name) will have considerably subsided by October due to vaccines. Woo hoo!  Go vaccines!

(And if you do have crystal balls, please seek medical attention.)

So here is the magic registration link for the October 10th race:

Registration for Paine to Pain 2021

Hey, I got a question or three!

Hush up young man, let me do my spiel, K?

First up, the Stupid-Cheap Rate ©®™! is back!  For two days only, you’ll get this race for just $40! That’s right! Just! Forty! Friggen! Dollars!!!!  That’s 62,101,600 Venezualan Bolívars, so you can really appreciate what a good deal this is!

Other races will charge you 40 bucks just for a picture! That’s why other races suck! Here you get the race, the photos, the medal, the shirt, the music, the post race food…..ahh yes, the food.  P2P veterans know how much I care about that! Is NewRo Runners an awesome race club, or what!?!

That rate (dollars, not bolívars) is from 12:01 a.m. on April 22nd (Earth Day) until 11:59 p.m. on April 23rd (my birthday).  After that, the rate goes up.

My 5th birthday.

But why your birthday?

I said hush up whippersnapper! Because I said so! (Also, Valerie Bertinelli was born the same day! And if you are my age and watched One Day at A Time in 1976, you would understand the significance!) More importantly, who’s going to overrule me?

That’s great, but is your race any damn good?

How did a dolt like you get into my email? It isn’t just good, in my completely unbiased opinion as race founder/director/grand poobah for all 12 prior iterations of this, it will be the greatest run since the Millenim Falcon did the Kessel run in under 12 parsecs! It’s even better than Cannonball Run II, and Sinatra was in that! Yeah, it’s that good. Even Mrs. Poobah and the little Poobahs agree!

Prospect Park Track Club tears up the course

Read the reviews from 2019! Or 2018! Or 2017! Or 2016! Or 2015! Or 2014! Or 2013! Or 2012!

Or read the two-page spread on the race in Trail Runner Magazine. That’s right. National press, baby. We baaad! But not in a creepy, Michael Jackson kinda way.

But, but , but…about the potential for cancellation due to coronavirus?

A pox on you and your ancestors! The virus will be gone, I tell you, gone! (Knock wood, toss salt over shoulder.)  Our cancellation / no refund rules remain in effect, except if we have to cancel due to the virus.  Then we’ll scramble like hell to figure out something fair. Which will be easy if we cancel before we order shirts and medals in August, but not so easy if afterward.

Alkis Valentin knows exactly where the cameras are.

But we don’t want to cancel!  We got one of the greatest trail loops this side of the Mississippi to run!

One last question, I swear. What do we do if we are already registered from last year?

Wow. You asked a good question. I’m impressed. Answer: You still must register, but you obviously don’t have to pay. Follow the instructions about halfway down the page under the heading “How to Claim a Deferred Registration” at this link for instructions on how to claim your deferral.

WE ARE BACK!!!!!!!!  Can I get a Hallelujah?

And thank you once again to our 2019 top tier sponsors:

Eric Turkewitz
Race Director, Grand Poobah
(Mrs. Poobah threatened divorce over use of Race Overlord or Darth Turkey.)
Paine to Pain Trail 1/2 Marathon
Westchester County, NY
Daytime phone: 212-983-5900
Eric [at] PaineToPain [dot] com

Real job (Where I put on my lawyer face):
The Turkewitz Law Firm
228 East 45th Street – Suite 1110
New York, NY  10017
Eric [at] TurkewitzLaw [dot] com